Tuesday, December 29, 2009
I'm going back to the corner, where I first saw you
To the last picture... My mum could never get more random. She had to sms me instead of taking the trouble of walking down a corridor and climbing up one flight of stairs(which would have been more sincere) just to tell me to stop painting my nails when she noticed I've been stocking up on the colours. If anyone ever blames me for being lazy, I'm telling you it's in the genes.
Anyway, HOW WAS YOUR CHRISTMAS? Mine was quiet and a stay-home(ok not like it was my own home but yeaaaaaah it's almost like 2nd home already) one and nothing of the ordinary like spraying foam in town or clubbing or drinking or pubbing or partying. Nope, I spent my day out with Weiru in the morning to run some errands and then she abandoned me and I headed to my 2nd home to seek refuge at Tampines.
CY Tan just booked in this evening again, but he's gonna be out on Thursday again. Talk about being so happy and optimistic kwa kwa kwa. Though I paid my price for his extra two days out(two days MC) bcos his collarbone still hurts like a motherfucker, I had to go over to his place for 2 days straight to keep him company - cos he couldn't step out of the house or it'll be awol if he gets caught.
Fucking hell everything in SAF also can kena charge.
And I quote him as CY Tan cos he loves to [ctrl + f] his own name whenever he's at Vodkalisque and skips the rest of my entry that doesn't concern him. Super into himself.
More photos over at FB but it's all in fragments of outings so it's pretty hard to post everything cos I have to elaborate alot. For now I'm just being a bacon as well to have a long post, cos I'm halfway through clearing my room that looks like it's been through a warzone. Sorting out what I want to get rid of for Flea Tian IV this sat.
YES I WILL BE THERE WITH WEIRU SO COME TO THE FLYER AND BUY FROM US LEH DON'T BE SO LITTLE OF A FRIEND!!
Friday, December 25, 2009
"Sometimes the best isn't what makes you the happiest"
"What you thought would have broken you to pieces made you hold yourself even tighter. Do you then realise the importance of us, of me, of you? The effort and strength to pull through this and believe in everything that's still almost far-fetched; believe that everything we have is nothing lesser than true. Nothing must screw up, and nothing will take me away from you."
You're the best gift ever.
Merry Christmas.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Someone called me 'Bacon' today
Because my tummy is inflating and my sleeping hours is multiplying and I think I've just brought myself to a whole new level that the word 'lazy' isn't even a quarter enough to express how I am right now. Maybe he thought pig wasn't the best word to describe me right now. So yeah, from now on I'm uh.... Bacon.Anyway!!! PEIPEI TURNED 19 ON THE 10TH!!!!
So overdued but she pooor thing, her birthday just before CTs and then like we go out think about how we haven't study for exams like sad only.
(can't stand Cheryl freaking act cute)
First stop: Marina Barrage. Highlights? I was the one that got the kite up effortlessly!! Bought way too much food, can't you tell. -.- Chocs melted, KFC unfinished, I brought the unfinished bananas home for Jayjay. (Jayjay's fav - bananas). Bought straw mat and kite then and there lucky it was on offer if not our throat kenna slit only.
The weather was melting us so we left early for town.
Cut her melted cake outside Ion!!
When I see this picture ah, I understand why they're together liao. Both also like to act cute.
Check out my outbreak before I was done with exams. 0.0
See this face? I was trying very hard to be
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HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHA
Obviously I failed.
CAN'T STAND HER FACE OMG NOW I LOOK AT IT I WANNA LAUGH AGAIN.
Cheryl and her another attempt of squirrel face
Last stop at Teoheng, being a very faithful customer we paid for one hour and got another hour free. Nehxs!!
I feel so sleepy now. Slept at 8 in the morning just to bid on a Topshop Kate Moss Romper that was only 7USD on eBay... And when I wanted to act cool and strike at the last 5 minutes before the bid closes, I FUCKING REALISED THAT THE SELLER ONLY ALLOWED USA REGISTERED BIDDERS?? LIKE WTF I'M STILL SHIPPING TO A US ADD RIGHT.... And by the time I emailed the seller to get her to unblock the settings, I was left with 26 seconds before the bid ended and yeah I lost it cos my page couldn't fucking load faster. So the bid closed at 7.50USD and I went to sleep after staying up for 5 hours for nothing being the most grumpiest girl alive. I can't believe I stayed up till 8 for nothing. 8.16am... to be specific. Ultimate FML scenario.
I still have a long list of errands to be done. Started on clearing out the clothes a little over at Denudde, a long overdued email I promised myself to write to Jo, developing photos for the room, successfully burn CDs for the car, throwing out stuff that I no longer need/want, continue to control myself from having stupid urges, make a police report, update Frdyfxtn(IT'S SO FUCKING ABANDONED!!!)...... While the rest of the world seems to be overseas right now it's a damn good time to get personal stuff done and have personal time. It's like how I prefer to shop alone than to shop with people hahahha shit I bet no one knew I was such an introvert.
Anyway I haven't been having very concrete entries about how everything about my life has been shifting these months. You know how transition periods puts this essence of uncertainty in you, but yet it makes you see things from a totally different perspective? It's pretty scary to realise you actually knew so little about yourself until you broke away from your comfort zone and open your eyes wide and seek what you knew you wanted all along.
I'm been the most honest bitch about my feelings lately, something I never knew I could be.. I still couldn't come to terms that I was the one that was so thick skin to tell Derek how I felt when I wasn't even sure how he felt. I didn't even think of the consequences of what would have happened if it was a one-sided thing and then I malu only. Hahhahahahhaha but yes I did, and I'm glad I was reckless for the first time.
I can't wait for him to come out of camp, can't picture him botak and burnt and cui. These two weeks has been a roller coaster ride, for me at least. Phonecalls at 9.30, sending mindless smses without getting replies every other day, worried about your arm injury and really missing you a whole fucking lot.
I could go crazy.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
CTs starts in approximately 3 hours 20 minutes.
I haven't touched 3 chapters of the paper I'll be sitting for later.
Not panicking. I'm still having lamb steak + fries + broccolis for lunch right now in my room. And all I can think of now is how almost everyone laughed when I told them I cooked broccolis for Derek on the day he enlisted whenever I stuff another broccoli into my mouth.
Sad.
Very funny meh?!
I know the pain of having a boyfriend with the govt like fuckingfinally. It's not funny, it's no joking matter, it's a viscious phase that could push you up the wall and put you on the brink of tears. I never thought it would have been even a quarter this bad(not even half) but Weijia told me I'm only human to feel this way.
Made a list of To-Dos after Friday when papers would end. Talk about focusing on studying... Sigh.
Have a lot of Peishi uploads to be done after the papers on how elaborately we celebrated her 19th.
Such a redundunt post, but I just needed it.
Ok back to eating.
Saturday, December 12, 2009
I've been cutting off my spilt ends for the past one hour or so, while Weiru was falling asleep on the couch behind me. I'm so obsessed with my hair these days but I guess that doesn't change the fact that it's still thin dry curly and almost close to looking like the hair between your pits.So much for work productivity. I should have stayed at Siglap alone to do my work, sighhh now I'm distracted with my spilt ends and it makes me wanna go for the haircut(which has been very delayed, haven't had one since CNY).
Everyone's like enjoying life except me. Shearen away in Indo, when I last called Imee she was L4D-ing, Nicole in Europe, Miko in Korea, Jr going to Korea soon, Simran and Price done with exams and the latter is going Zoukout(!!!) tonight............ All fuckers. And then when it's time for me to study everyone starts asking me out. All fuckers again.
I feel so fat now, cos I just drank another can of Red Bull and ate Pringles and chocs and 3 yoghurt topps. Notice you eat a lot more when you're depressed? I feel like some xiaolongbao right now at Novena.
By the way if you're a good friend, please don't ask me out until the 18th unless it's for the only good reason to ask me out - which is to study. Please eject fear in me by telling me that I will fail no matter how hard I try, and I will have to retake module, and I will have to be barred from attachment if I fail...... All in the name of friendship you'll be the bestest friend ever for the motivation you're gonnna give me and please act like you mean it if you say for the sake of saying I know you acting only and like.. No effect what like that.
Shit I just pressed my hair ends between my thumb and index and I heard that 'zzzzzz' sound.
SO DRY.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Feeling too much that it feels like nothing
Feels like you're going for a 2 year jail sentence when you're finally gonna be botak tmr. And we just saw each other for the last night merely for an hour - which was well spent with every second that passed in any case.. But sigh one hour nia.
I think I got over the fact the night before, that you can't be there for me whenever I want you to anymore. The phrase 'time is not a factor', is screwed it into my mind hard and good and I didn't pull a long face today when we met like, wtf!! So little time and I still wanna waste time sulking. Pretty dumb right. So I was logical and I didn't.
It's not the end of the world. I'm sure technology will save us.. Now that I have free outgoing to Derek my phone bill won't go rocket high no more!!!
Shit la.
Ugh.
Fuck.
